Characters of Members

Anonymous Members

Novelists

Poetry Writers

Our Scottish Writer

One of our writers was Scottish. he read his poems out in broad Scottish, which few could understand. My favourite poem was the one about the neighbours and the snail. One neighbour threw the snail over into the neighbour's garden. The other neighbour lobbied it back. i think the story was told from the point of view of the snail.

Three Cat Lovers

One lady had a cat which needed to be fed. She always left exactly at 9.25, just before the end of the meeting at 9.30. If the meeting ran late, she got up and walked out. I think that sometimes her husband was waiting outside for her and she did not wish him to wait in the cold and dark. 

When challenged, she told me, "I have to go home to feed the cat her evening meal and let her out.

One of the ladies always wrote about cats. If it was a poem, she wrote about cats. Science fiction, the cat was in the rocket, either manning it or as a passenger, or watching it overhead from the ground. A detective story, the cat was the detective or the villain. Humour, a funny poem about a cat. A story about love, a story about a cat. A murder mystery, the cat did it. A piece about Harrow, Harrow cats. An article about an event in history. she wrote about cats. Famous people, all cat owners.

When we had to judge a contest, the short stories were anonymous and we had a vote. But it was obvious who had written what. She always wrote about cats.

You might have thought that the two ladies who loved cats would be friends. But no. One of them had a pedigree cat and looked down on the lady who had a non-pedigree cat. 

The other lady took a dim view of pedigree cats. Overbred, unhealthy, for people who had more money than sense.

Another lady had a house full of cats. She offered to hold meetings at her house. One of the members went to visit, to check suitability. Why the check? We had the offfer of a free venue. it was large enough for our small. Number. 

But the report came back that the venue was not suitable. Why not?

You don't want to know. I do wan to know. 

She has stray cats, several of them, and other cats which visit. Her house stinks of cats, which mark their territory. We have a member who is allergic to cat fur. They will die if they spend five minutes in that house.

Our wonderful Barbara, however, had many meetings in her house, despite being the fourth cat lady. Her cats were banished to the garden or another room when we held meetings at her house.

She had many cat and mouse stories. Her cat had one outside cat visitor who came to take the milk left out for her cat. A wild cat two shy to enter the house. It lived behind her shed. it scuttled wawy when she held her summer garden party.  

The Teacher

Over the years, we had several members who were teachers. One of them was very bossy. She thought we were her class. She was always correcting our English. I thought this was very useful. But one or two of the men did not like being corrected.

Eventually, she grew old and ill and disappeared. I wrote a story about a character, based on her, quoting some of the phrases she had used during the past year or so. 

At the end of the year we had a contest, and i put in my story. To my horror, she turned up. Not only did she hear my story, she was the one who read it out. I sat quaking, terrified she would recognize herself and be furious.

However, she had no idea it was based on her. She told me, "You wrote a great story about a great character, What a horrible woman!"

The Smokers